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How come every time I come back to Xanga I think: "Oh gosh! I haven't updated in a bizzillion years!" ...
*thinks deeply about this while a microwave explodes in the distance* I guess it's just because I haven't clicked the update button.... Lazy much?
Okay, let me bring you up to speed with what's been happening in my life since I updated last, then I'll tell you about my horrendous adventure this week! *gasp!*
Let's see, in March I had Pneumonia (hated it), went to a Sadie Hawkins dance (loved it), and turned 17 years young (w00t!!!!!). In April I donated my hair again, this time 10 inches (last time it was 24 inches) of my hair to a child cancer patient. If anyone is interested in knowing what I look like now, here are some pictures:
Before & After:
 
Okay, so that's all the main stuff that I haven't written about yet... I would love to delve into more detail but I'm pretty worn out after getting back from the Hospital. Yep, once again my health gets me into a pretty dern big mess. But somehow, out of the whole thing I feel so much more peaceful now. Lessons are everywhere, you just have to be open to learning them. Even if it's the hard way.
Let me explain... It all started with this gorgeous prom dress... So I was thinking, greeny-blue dress, very purty, must take pictures of it - oh how about we take those pictures in the woods!!! Sounds good? Oh dear, NO! Who in their right mind would go into the woods with a low-neck prom dress?! Obviously not someone with sense in their mind *points a "I'm with stupid" sign at herself*. heh heh (slaps in a picture of me in the dress for a not-so-dramatic effect)
As soon as I finished taking the pictures I started getting weird marks on my neck. The next day it turned a strange color. And the next it got even worse, but you know what? I didn't think anything about it. lol. The next morning I was rudely awakened to my reflection of an unrecognizable face with a swollen and mangled neck and chest. Ok, now even for as blond as I usually act, that got my attention.
Apparently, I am very allergic to poison ivy. A week went by of this stuff covering my body. But it wasn't just painful, it was embarrassing too. And for an already self-conscious girl this was a big deal. I couldn't leave the house or I'd get weird stares. People and friends either diverted their eyes from me or looked grossed out. I was the same person as I've always been, but I felt so small with the whole world looking at me. Even within my own home I got weird stares; my youngest brother kept calling me a freak. I have to admit that it really got to me. I got angry and I started yelling at him to shut up. It didn't phase him a bit, but as soon as those words slipped from my lips I regretted it greatly. You can't fight fire with fire, same goes for harsh words.
Soon after I was whisked off to the Hospital. I got a shot and medication, but I went into shock after only being there for an hour...
Hard week? I'd say so! It seems silly for me to make such a big deal over poison ivy! I had no clue I was so painfully allergic to it. Even though this whole week I just wanted to give up and cry, I never did. Now I'm the kind of girl who cries over anything... Like there's this one cartoon character on TV any time he frowns I just want to cry. lol. Oh, ahem, anyway *serious voice again*
On the road from the Hospital a song came on by Adie Camp, it was about doing things God's way. I realized; God had been keeping me close the whole time when I felt so messed up. Then another thought really came smacking into me; Do I have the right to complain about this?
Yes I'm hurting, but think of all the things that have happened to me in the past. I have moved so many times I didn't even try building friendships for years, I used to be under the controlling emotions of cutting and anorexia, I have nearly died from health complications, I lost my youngest brother, lost my only sister... And then I thought, even all of these things can't even compare to what Jesus went through for me to live this life, and what have I been doing this whole time? Complaining about my life... That has to hurt Jesus, that He did so much for me, and all I did was hate every day of this week.
And the only thing I can say right now is... Oh God, I am so sorry that I ever complained about this week! I am so blessed. Forgive me that at times I forget how graced I am to live this life that you have given me!!!
,·*¯*·.¸ (¯`¤.,¸_¸,.×´¯`»
.`×.,¸_¸,.¤´¯) Melody ♥
(_¸.¤´¯`×.¸..`×.¸
 PS: To anyone who actually read all of that, here's a cookie for you! *Mmm!* Thanks for letting me spill out my heart into this journal entry. And please know that I am recovering nicely now! I've been singing and dancing all day. ;D I have a feeling another crazy cooking session with flying Melody-style is in dire need! Check back next time when I will (hopefully) be back to normal and to see what crazy things I get myself into this time! hehe! Till then!!! *waves goodnight, and has a staring contest with the happy cookie* |
| | Posted 5/5/2007 10:07 PM - 20 Views - 12 eProps - 8 comments
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AWWW! i dont think i've ever gotten into poison ivy tho so EEEEK i dont know how it is! but i'm allergic to the sap that is on the ends of the evergreen trees...it makes my arms break out and itch...i hate it! yikes funny how you left me a comment on my hardest day of the year. I was depressed when i woke up telling myself i didnt want to go to school...i wanted to skip and with that in mind i had the most horrible day. This kid in my 1st, 2nd and 3rd class who likes to pick at me....just wow made me so mad. Then in chemistry i didnt have my homework done and it just kinda snowballed from there. by the time i got home i was on the verge of tears...my eyes were full but n tears were coming and i didnt want to talk to anyone. Luckily my stepmom saw on my face that i was upset and i cried right there and she and my dad sat me down and i talked about everything that was bothering me and got it all out of my system. when i saw ur comment a little bit later it made me happy 
but i was still being followed by a dark cloud. But! today was wonderful! i cant thank God enough for all the days of my life....the hard ones and the not so hard ones! thanx for being a friend to me! You are amazing! and i'm soooooo thankful that ur better! and before i go...i wanted to tell u that with each day i talk to u u become more beautiful in God and ...u said u have a low self-esteem...but i wanted to let u know...from a sister to a sister...that u are a stunning beauty!! dont let anyone tell u differently! especially not urself! i let myself put me down all the time...RAWR but i'm working on it! p.s. that dress is gorgeous!! hahaha! okay i sure hope when i hit submit this sends cause otherwise hahaha lol! i'll ttyl! thank you for the comment melody! ur wonderful! RAwk on and God bless!
that must be tough! but, you said it, nothing could compare to what Jesus went through for all of us... and the good news is, is that He is still there for us... ready to take our pain... our greif, our burdens, our wounded souls.. and completely heal us and wash us away in His perfect love! ... I pray that He will show you that, especially now... 
I hope that makes you feel even the slightest bit better!... God loves you Melody! He always will... well anyway, I hope you have a great rest of the week... talk to ya later!
